At the Same Time

At the Same Time.

I am at the symphony.

I am listening, absorbing… and soon find I am instructing myself to let the music wash over me. Just let it come.

My mind wanders to just a week before, when I was standing in the ocean and pondering big things, as one can’t help but do when standing in the ocean, and telling myself the same thing. Let it wash over you. Just enjoy it.

I think about how similar the experiences are. I also think about how long ago that seems. One week.

I think, these two points in time seem distant because I am standing on the timeline.

If I took a step back, the two points would seem closer together.

If I stepped back even further, and then further than that, the two points in time would be indistinguishable. Just one small, single dot in a very long string that started long, long ago.

So, I am at the symphony

And at the same time, I am in the ocean

At the same time I am trying out for the school play and

There’s a bang of the timpani.

There’s a big wave and I jump.

At the same time I am meeting him.

At the same time, I am 5 years old and afraid to jump off the swing.

At the same time, he is breaking my heart.

From far enough away, it appears that I am taking the SATs while simultaneously making the world’s best margarita and having my diaper changed.

At the same time, I am 7 and jump off the swing only to land face first in the gravel.

At the same time, I am turning 80 years old and have obviously survived the swing incident of 1988.

At the same time, I still love him.

At the same time, I am in my bedroom, writing this down

But the entire orchestra is playing hand cymbals and it sounds like snow, or confetti and I will always be here.

And the water is unseasonably warm.